Friday, September 28, 2012

Change of Residency

Some of you may or may not have heard, but this last week I have had to quickly change where I was residing.

Before I came to Jordan I found a family that wanted to host a girl who could help teach their children English.  Once I arrived to Amman I was able to call one of my host sisters and she told the taxi driver exactly where to go.  It was so simple.  I got to their house completely exhausted from the trip, but my mind was racing in circles.  Slowly as the whole family came home, I got to meet all six children as well as the mother and father.  They are a very beautiful family.  I had a wonderful time trying to teach them English and a very challenging time trying to understand their Arabic.   It was great for me to be completely surrounded by Arabic all the time and I was given the rare opportunity for a foreigner to see the inside day-to-day life of a local family.  I quickly grew in love with several members of the family including their youngest son, Laith, who I tutored in English at least every-other night.  

On Friday, financial circumstances changed for me unexpectedly and I decided to see if I could find a place there I could move to that would be cheaper for me.  That way I wouldn't have to pay for a taxi everyday.   Honestly I was stuck in the middle trying to decided if I really wanted to move from this wonderful Jordanian family what would help me with my spoken Arabic, or if I wanted to move closer to campus where I could walk to campus, but be surrounded by foreigners.  Suddenly on Monday, I was informed that circumstances changed on the family's end where I could no longer stay with them.  They told me that I could stay at their house until I found an other place to stay.

In the mean while, the first ten days that I was in Jordan, the only people I knew were my host family.  We were extremely limited in our communication which made me very lonely.  I am an extremely social person, so not being able to connect with people was extremely difficult.  Any of my friends who I was able to talk to during that time would testify to that.  On Saturday I got tired of being alone, so I decided that the next day at school, I would make friends--and I did.

On Sunday after class I invited a girl to go eat lunch with me and I over heard some other students asking what they should do.  I said, "You should go eat with us!"  One of the girls quickly replied, "Okay."  At the language center, most of the students are only there to study Arabic so we have a lot of extra time.  Just as well, most of us came alone or with a only a few other people so we were all excited to meet new people.   We had a rather large group at lunch that day.  We all shared our different stories and exchanged phone numbers.  One of the guys at the table was going to be meeting up with his language exchange partner/friend so Ronia (American from Maryland who comes from Jordanian parents) and I went with him.  There we met Rojeh, who has been a complete life saver for me!  Afterwards, the four of us hung out the entire evening, and basically everyday since.  

The next day after I made these new friends, I was informed that I couldn't stay with my host family any more.  Rojeh did a great job at helping me find a place to live and the both Rojeh and Ronia were amazing at helping me figure everything out.  I feel so blessed to have such good friends who cared about me so much in such a short amount of time.  We found a place very close to the gate that I always use.  It makes it really easy for me to get on campus.  I have my own room and I have a TV that I can watch Arab shows on so that my ears to be hearing Arabic.  Honestly it's nice to have a place where I can get away from everything.  My room is like a safe haven from the rest of the world.  Whenever it the world just becomes so much, I know know that I have a place where I can go and get away from everything--a place that is simply mine.

I moved out of my host family's house on Tuesday night (the day after I was informed that I had to leave).  Rojeh went with me in the taxi to hold it while I was packing my stuff.  He wound up having to get another one, but by the time I was packed and ready he was back with one.  I quickly throw everything into my suite cases because I couldn't take to long.  Laith looked at me and asked me what I was doing.  I told him that I had to go.  He asked when.  When I told him that night, he looked like he wanted to cry.  He had told his sister only the day after I arrived that he already loved me.  Neveen (the 2nd daughter) told me to call her whenever I wanted to get together and that we could still hang out.  My host mom came into the room and I gave her the watch that I hadn't been able to give to the father yet.  I brought gifts for all of them from America and I never got the perfect opportunity give it to him.  The mom walked back into the room with a brown bag, a bottle of perfume, and a small key chain of the Kaba for me.  It was so sweet!  I wanted to cry!

I brought all of my stuff to my new place and gathered some stuff to stay the night with Ronia.  I didn't want to be alone that night.  The next night I stayed at my place alone.  It was actually really nice.  I rearranged my furniture and put the two beds together.  When I woke up the next morning I had a great sense of peace about it.  Sometimes things have to change unexpectedly, but I know that it will all work out for the better.  This was a major expense that I was not expecting, but in the end I think it's for the best.  Now I have a place to go and restore myself and to reflect on everything that I am learning.  As I work more and more on my room, I expect I will like how it turns out and it will become my new home.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Amman عمان

Really, there is so many little observations that I could spend time talking about, but I tried to choose the most significant.  If you have any questions, you can ask and I'll try to answer them.

Location:
Amman is the capital of Jordan.  It located in the northwestern corner of Jordan east of the West Bank and Jerusalem.  Because it is so close to the West Bank, many Palestinians either work here and return to Palestine, or have moved to Amman completely.  Just as well, I have found an unusually high residence of Saudis (from Saudi Arabia) here.  Although I can expect someone to tell me that they're Palestinian here, the Saudis have the habit of wearing the traditional Saudi wardrobe in public which is a instant indication of their nationality.  Although not every man wearing a thobe is from Saudi.  I have to be careful to not assume it because sometimes their from other southern countries such as Oman or Yemen.  

Fashion:
In Jordan you will find a broad spectrum of clothing.  Everyone wears pants outside no matter how hot it is.  Only occasionally will you see boys wearing shorts or girls wearing knee high skirts out at the stores and restaurants.  Thankfully for me, skinny jeans are popular here so I fit in quite fine.  Interestingly enough, even the girls who wear the hijab (the vail to cover their hair and neck and ears) tend to wear skinny jeans.  Of course the idea of a muhijaba (woman who wears the hijab) has many different interpretations and one can see that by looking at how the different girls dress here.  Although the hijab is very popular in Amman, it is not required (politically or culturally).  I have mananged just fine without wearing a hijab and you will see muhijaba and non-muhijaba all socializing just the same.  Here the hijab is a matter of religious choice.  I would argue that because I am a Christian, I feel no reason to wear a vail to cover my hair, but that opinion changes from person to person.  Many muslim women feel inclined to cover their heads, but they usually don't condemn someone for not doing it.  For example, I am living with a host family and most of the women in the family choose to be a muhijaba, but one does.  They don't think any less of me nor treat me differently.  Although that is also a matter of differences of religion.  Some muslim girls would say that you are not a muslim if you do not wear the hijab while other muslim girls choose not to wear it and feel no reason to.

The fashion of the men are pretty universal.  They wear jeans and a t-shirt.  Some men like to wear button down shirts and let their chest hair pop out, but that is by far not the majority.  Over all, I feel like the men are better kept here as compared to the United States.  Even though they often wear t-shirts, the shirts will be well kept polos or button-down dress shirts and everything is matching.  It seems like going out of the house here requires more effort.  People dress in anything within the home, but girls would never be caught without make-up outside of the house and men always dress their best even though they are just going shopping.  Even school uniforms are well cut and fashionable.  The amount of make-up that girls wear here exhaust me.  My host sisters will spend 30 minutes before leaving the house to fix their make-up.  Even girls who choose to be more modest by wearing the hijab cake on the make-up.

Typical building in Amman.
Buildings & Streets:
Amman is a city build on top of hills.  The buildings are all built on top of each other.  Each building houses five or more families in it.  The cars are parked on the street or under the building in car ports.  Everything is made from bricks made from the rocks.  Whenever rock is removed, that proves a place for a new building to be built.  There is no such thing as going "straight" in Jordan.  Almost all of the roads have some type of turn or bend in them.  The roads that are straight are no where near perpendicular with each other and the usually get broken up with a traffic circle so you have to turn anyways.  Most of the roads are paved but they do not all have curbs.  Then those which do have curbs have very high ones.  There are no "curb checks" here.  You just damage your car, which if you look around at all the different cars, most of them have some type of crape or dent in them.  Although this isn't from the curbs, but from the crazy traffic.

As compared the United States, everyone here would get reckless driving tickets.  There are lanes painted on the roads, but no one pays attention to them.  It's basically like schools of fish all trying to swim in the reefs of the oceans.  They are all going their own direction all at once and it's matter of getting where you want to go in the least amount of time without hitting anyone.  Car horns are not a way to express anger or peril danger.  Here, they are used to inform people that you are coming up on their side and to not turn into you.  Being a pedestrian requires skills in physics as well as courage.  Thankfully, I learned from the culture in Guymon (my hometown) when to start walking towards a car to make it across the street before the next care gets to you.  If you don't do this, then you will be standing on the side of the road for a very long time.  When traffic is consistent, then most people just take advantage of the cautious drivers and make the traffic stop as they walk across the street.  Really if you just pay attention to everyone and everyone around you, you'll be fine in the street.

With that being said, it is good to be aware of everything, but there are things that you do not want to show attention to.  Such things that I've experienced are are the guys yelling out of their car window and people coming up to you to buy something.  I usually pay no attention to them.  Their is no need to.  All and all though, I feel like growing up in the community that I did had given me the experience that I needed to be completely fine here on the streets.

CASSETTE TAPES!!!!
Technology:
I am a technology person.  I make videos and graphics so I pay attention to things like that more than the average person.  Amman has fascinated me with how it is caught somewhere between the world of 1990s where they listen to cassette tapes and the modern era where you can get internet on your phone.  My host sistered took me to a cassette store to by a tape for their brother-in-law and I just laughed!  No wonder why Arab music is so hard to find on YouTube, they are still using cassettes.  But just the same, most of the cell phones here can carry WiFi.  Although, the internet is not overall very accessible.  Even though restaurants or even the college say that they have WiFi, it is hardly high speed and it is often hard to access.  Thankfully my host family has internet in their home so I am able to post this blog.

The advertisement here is incredible!  I have found both extremes.  Internationals businesses have advertisements that occupy the entire side of a build (like you would find in Dallas TX) but then, local businesses still hand write their promotions.  The larger businesses will have everything in Arabic and English, while the smaller ones only have it in Arabic.  Restaurants usually have everything writing in Arabic on their menus, but honestly, it's hard to translate Arabic dishes and even if they did, the name would still be the same.  Between my drive from the University and my home, I see it all.  Pioneering technology in advertisement, as well as a local vender selling grapes on our street corner.

Gas Station where you get full service
People:
Jobs are hard to come by here and those who do work get paid very little.  I have found people working everywhere.  They guard a gate at the university or they pump gas at the gas station.  In one store their will be four people working when there is only seven customers in the store at a time.  Large stores employee people to supervise each section of the store and to provide service to customers.  Where in American we have made technology work, here, they employee people to do it.  Most people seem to only stand around at their jobs for large parts of the day.  Of course I only see the for front of the job market.

As we were driving around Amman (while my host sister was learning how to drive), we crossed small sections of the city where the urban met the rural.  Tucked within all of these buildings, there was a small field that had little vegetation where a boy was leading a herd of sheep.  It was interesting to see how his forty sheep fallowed him as he rode on his donkey around the field.  A few blocks away I saw another group of people, mostly children, picking through the trash, putting trash in their bag on their donkey.  Hidden between buildings I find blank blocks of land were there are farmers and people who live in tent.

Male/Female Interactions:
In Amman you will find girls and boys talking.  It is especially common at the University.  If you go to less populated areas in the University you are bound to find a couple sitting alone enjoying a drink and conversation together.  Outside of the University is less mixed.  Usually I find families together then groups of young men spending time together out at the store or on the street.  They tug on each others shirts, hold each others arms, and talk about the girls walking by.  Girls on the other hand have their own groups of female friends, but they spend more of their time inside of a restaurant or at someone's home.  The house is definitely the women's domain.  This is where they take off their vail and change into something more comfortable.  Here they don't have to put on the front of make-up and style like they do for the world.

Language:
I am here to learn Arabic.  I am taking formal Arabic classes at the University of Jordan.  There I only tested into level 3 of 7.  At level 6 you're allowed to take classes at the university.  I find myself quite comfortable in my level so I won't change.  There are many things that he is teaching us that I already know, but there are a lot of vocabulary that I do not know.  I was thinking before I took the placement test that if I get into a lower level class I would be fine with it because I wouldn't be so stressed.  Other students who had tested into higher levels said that they are hard for them.  I'm not sure how quickly someone can go up in levels but next semester I will go up.  The class as all been or professor testing the atmosphere of the class so far.  Now that I'm certified to teach English, I find myself observing his teaching style just as much as the content of the class.

Outside of the classroom is something completely different.  Honestly, I can understand most things that they say in class and I can understand a large majority of what is written, but I hardly understand anything what my host family says.  It's improving slowly.  The Jordanian dialect has a sweeter tongue for the girls.  The Arabic letter ق ("qua") is pronounced like a "ga" by the boys here but girls pronounce it at "ah".  So the word دقيقة ("daqiqa" meaning minutes) is pronunciation "dagega" by males and "da'e'a" by the girls and some of the boys.  I've been trying to train myself to see the ق as an "ah" but it is challenging, but in class, it is probably better that I don't.  I was told that sweet girls say the ع as a "ah" as well.  So because I don't say طبعا incorrectly, I sound like a sweet girl.  It's all about having the girls use softer sounds.  I've been told before that I sound cute when I speak in Arabic.  I guess this dialect should be easy for me.  There are so many differences in vocabulary and honestly it takes my host family a while to understand when I speak in formal Arabic.  Even the simplest words such as "cat" are different here. My host family has been doing a great job teaching me the local dialect and today at lunch I actually understood several words they were using!  I hardly speak in Arabic still.  I think that I'll have to actually understand before I can ever reply, so every mean time or evening hooka (which here is called shisha) time spend with me trying to understand the dialect and to learn new words.

A quick tidbit about the Jordanian dialect: "No" is either "la" or a click with your mouth as you lift your eyebrows and "Yes" is simply "Ah."  Often times I mix them together...I need to work on that.  But my host family likes to shake their head no and say "yes" so I guess we're all the same.

Side stores.  This one is selling bananas.  
Food:
My host family eats one large meal a day.  This has been a huge struggle on my body!  The first meal I had with them was a very large meal and probably the best Arab food that I've had.  (I apologize to all of my wonderful friends who have cooked for me)  I truly enjoyed it, but since I find it better for myself to eat small amounts several times a day, I didn't eat half as much as they did before I was full.  Then I find myself hungry again by dinner time, but they don't eat.  This has been really hard on my body.  Hunger mixed with the heat and studying, I sleep large portions of the day.  My family thinks that I don't like their food because I don't eat very much.  I've tried to explain that that is not the case.  I think that they are slowly understanding.  One day I slept through meal time (which is typically around 3pm) and I was very hungry by 7pm.  I was looking around in the kitchen but of course I have no idea about how to prepare any of their food.  My host mom asked me if I wanted McDonald's.  I politely refused.  I feel like they assume that because I'm American I like fast food.  I guess I'm a strange American it that way.

My host family eats around the large coffee table that sits in the middle of their living area.  They have a dining table located in the parlor, but the only time we go in there is when we're studying or need to go out the back to the car.  It varies on how we eat.  Most days we all get our own dish and fill it with the food that we want from the pans and bowls sitting on the table.  Other times we all just eat out of the same dishes.  We always pull the couches around and all nine of us eat off the coffee table.  We do use spoons, but usually we just use the pita bread to pick up food.  Tons of dipping!

Laying on my bed (where I spend most of my time)
Culture's reaction towards me:
Honestly, they think I look Arab so they don't think twice about it.  There is such a mix of people here that I don't really stand out.  My host bother Osama looks whiter than I do.  He has a white complexion with blue eyes and he has a full face and full figure.  I would think he's American until he starts to talk. They reverse goes for me.  Usually whenever I have to ride a taxi (which is twice a day to go to school) I ask the taxi driver if they know English just so they will be prepared.  Whether they say yes or no usually doesn't matter because we talk in Arabic anyways.  My saying is, "If you know a little English and I know a little Arabic, then we will meet somewhere in the middle."  We went to the store the first weekend I was here and the salesman in the store swear that I had some type of Arab decent in me.  "Sorry sir, I don't."


It is interesting actually being in the Middle East.  I use to tell everyone that I wanted to live and work in the Middle East, but in a way, I felt like I was deceiving myself by assuming that I would love a place that I had never been too.  Now I'm here and the reality of the Middle East is staring me in the face.  Thankfully, I'm staring back at it and my confidence still has not changed.

Sunday, September 16, 2012

I'm finally in Jordan!!

I left Elkhart, Kansas, at 7:30 Thursday morning, and now, it's 8 pm in Jordan.  6 hours of driving, 2 hours to Chicago, then a 12 hour flight to Amman, plus a 30 minute taxi ride from the airport.  I'm here.  Jordan has an 8 hour times difference so it's already night time here when it's only early afternoon at home.  Honestly, I'm tired now.  My body is exhausting.  Sleeping 8 hours in a chair can be very exhausting, but my mind is thinking too fast.  There is too much to think about.
My mom and I at Will Rogers Airport OKC

I got to the airport with some of my wonderful friends and met others there.  They were such a blessing to have.  Finally the time came where I had to go through security.  I feel like after you have planned something for so long, there is something inside of you that pushes you forward when the time comes.
My very first flight (ever) was a small plane to Chicago.  We were all just tucked into the plane for two hours.  The man next to me was a Chicagoan, and you could tell the cultural difference from him and the three Oklahoman-oil-machine technicians that were sitting in front of us.  I talked to the two guys sitting in front of me (Mark and Matt) and read.  It was enjoyable.  Afterwards they asked to take my picture which made me feel loved already.

Will Roger's Airport OKC
When the flight first started to take off, I could just feel it picking up speed.  So many time I wished my car could go that fast and lift off of the ground, but in an airplane we did.  It's funny because my attitude the whole time wasn't fear or intimidation, but complacency.  Flying is just another mode of transportation.  You sit there and wait to arrive.

Once I reached Chicago, Terminal 5, I realized that I was leaving the country.  The first flight was only a taxi ride to my second.  I was wondering around looking for where I was suppose to get my boarding pass, (this time Donnie wasn't there to do it for me), and I noticed one stand of nothing but Arabs.  My heart sunk.  All of a sudden I realized that I was a white American.  Yes, I tell my arab friends that I am, but it doesn't mean that I actually realize it.  I cowardly walked up to the front desk, trying to act intimidated by the Arab families that surrounded me.  The man at the front desk spoke English well, but with an accent.  I got so confused, but of course in this situation, I usually just smile and look cute and they take care of me.  The man asked me where I wanted to sit on the plane.  I just told him that I wanted to be around people.  I hate being alone.  He handed me my ticket and said, "The man that is sitting next to you will be a very lucky man today."

Royal Jordanian Airlines in Chicago 
Once I got onto the plane, I found out the only man sitting next to me was sitting there with his wife.  Not quite what I think the man at the desk intended.  I also set next to a family of Palestinians.  Two girls and their mother who lived in US, but are returning for their daughters engagement.  It always amazes me how people respond to me.  Often Arabs think that I don't know anything and they feel like they need to explain everything to me.  I try to be patient and learn from their different perspectives-weed the new information from the old-find the new perspective that I haven't heard before.  Even when they treat me as someone who doesn't know anything, I try to remember that I can still learn from them.  A lot of times what I learn the most is what they think my stereotypes of them should be.  It's an interesting way of learning, but it's enjoyable.  Those ladies were wonderful and I enjoyed getting to spend time with them.  Inshallah (God willing), I will be able to attend one girl's engagement party this year.

Reaching the Amman Airport was interesting.  The Royal Jordanian airlines were very nice with movies and music built in.  There was a tracker of our flight so we knew where we where at all times.  They provided blankets, pillows, head phones, wet wash clothes, tea, coffee--nearly anything that we could want.  Once I got the airport I remembered that Jordan is not a first world country.  Thankfully enough though, the airport and nearly everything else is labeled in both Arabic and English.  I would have been lost without it.  My check card was easily accepted for everything accept the taxi ride.  It's amazing just how easy the traveling really was.  Where they didn't know English, I knew Arabic and vise versa.

Party with Leeth (youngest host brother)
As I drove through Amman, my mind just started racing with vocabulary.  I started to think of all the different words I have learned and it motivates me to speak in Arabic when everyone around me is.  I just pray that I will be able to absorb Arabic better while I'm here--that I can remember and naturally adapt to this new language.  Let my mind shift so that it does not have to strain and cry any more.
As I was unpacking, my mind was just thinking, "I'll be here a year then I'll leave."  In some regards a year sounds like a long time, but in others, it's only a short while.  In comparison to my college career, that's a whole year of school activities that I will miss and a year of friendship building that will not be there with my friends in Norman, but in comparison to my life, one year is only a short time that will one day be easily over looked.  I believe it's vital for us to take opportunities like these to try and experience new things to help us grow.  It's only one year, but the byproducts of it will be tremendous.

While driving home from the airport, I was just thinking about how it's all the same.  Looking out on the dry desert, of course there are several differences, but just the same, it was just people living in a land with their families.  Really I feel like regardless of our differences, people are people.  We all feel the same way.

Sunday, September 9, 2012

Waiting on Jordan

To all of my friends, a little background information:
I am currently a Junior at the University of Oklahoma (OU) and I am doing an independent study abroad at the University of Jordan at their International Institute for Teaching Arabic to Speakers of Other Languages (II-TASOL).  My flight is on Thursday, September 13th, and I'll be in Jordan for two semesters.  I want to get an internship either for this Spring, or for the Summer, so depending on what type of internships I get into, I will be back in the States in early to late Summer 2013.
I have found a wonderful host family that I will be staying with in Jordan.  They have 6 children (2 girls who are around my age & 3 boys who are all younger than me & one girl out of the house).  It's interesting how although I hardly know them, I feel like they're already my family.  I am very excited to finally meet them!
It's crazy being here in the States just waiting to go to Jordan.  OU already started their semester so all of my friends are busy with classes.  They graciously make time for me in their busy lives, but it's still just not the same.  I'm left filling my time trying to entertain myself with thoughts of Jordan and thoughts of my beloved friends and family.
I love and will miss you all!